where the stories go

The more I learn of myself, the more I realize what a blind and stupid fool I am. Slowly do I learn, and even slower do I begin the process of application.

“the end is worth the pain it took to get us there”
(Relient K)

I anxiously anticipate the day when I can look back with a bemused expression on my face, smiling knowingly and recognizing my silliness, when my heart no longer bears scars and the places I thought they would be forever engraved have become the home of far greater emotions and relationships than I could at this point have imagined.

Somehow grace without measure was granted me this year. I have been blessed with the gift of forgiveness and hindsight less than a year later. And I can see a purpose for my anxiety and seemingly vain strivings. Now I see another reason for this slowly-revealed wisdom – to show that these trials last but for a time, and that will come a time when these unbearable troubles will grant me needed insight.

May God give me the patience to endure what I cannot direct or control and the wisdom to change what I can.

“i know what i should do, but i just can’t walk away”
(Jimmy Eat World)

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3 thoughts on “where the stories go

  1. Seems like we’re in the same place right now, a time of healing. Sometimes I wish the process would just go faster. I want a quick fix, remember when band-aids used to make everything all better?

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