What I have been learning

April might be a little early to reflect on the year, but from where I sit, any day is a great day to reflect on where you have been and are going.

At least as long as you remember to stop reflecting and get the mail, return your library books, and make dinner.

2012 (or rather, God, in the year of 2012) has conspired mightily with events to teach me to wait.  I have followed through as far as I am able, and then left to me is but to wait.

You (and I, as well) might argue the importance of continued action. And this is a good reminder, but it speaks only to the moment. And the moment is important, but even if I do get around to calling in to see if I qualify for unemployment today, there is nothing in that action to lessen the weight of uncertainty that sits on my chest.

So in waiting and seeking and waiting there must remain the prepositional phrase. On whom am I waiting? From whom am I expecting direction? If ever that answer is anyone but Jesus, impatience and anxiety are bound to follow.

But when I cling to the hope of my salvation, there is peace, even if it only starts out as knowledge. And the more heavily I lean into Christ, the less tightly I hold to the burdens I have chosen for myself.

“Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” Romans 5:5


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